Tuesday, March 8, 2011

prayer, solitude, laughter

Quick update: I seemed to have forgotten the password to my other blog, which is great because I can just make another one! I tend to do well with fresh starts, and I have discovered that I need to do a better job of expressing and sharing what the Lord has put on my heart. I need to REMEMBER all that he teaches me each day or each week. So, with this new revelation and new respect for the emotions, feelings, and thoughts that the Lord has given me, I want to let all of you know that I intend on posting weekly all that the Lord is teaching me. This is a discipline that I want to incorporate into my life in order to remember and refelct on the Lord. I always say that I love sharing and being open with everyone, so why not take that love and express it and put it into action. Now, that gives you the freedom to call me out and tell me to put up a new post....even if you aren't going to read it! (which who would listen to this jibber jabber of nonsense, unless its words directly from the Lord, and if that is the case I'll put that in bold flashing letters to let you know this is worth reading. haha!)

Now, to reflect on the past couple of weeks I wanted to use the words that have entitled this post.

Prayer: This has been a common theme that has been coming up a lot in the past couple of weeks. And not just the concept of prayer, that of course should be on our hearts daily (hopefully). The theology of prayer has come into my life quite a bit lately. How should we pray? Is there a correct way? Do we truly believe that Lord can hear us/is he listening to our "pety" praying? Is it okay to request things from the Lord? Is there anything we should not pray for? Does prayer change the Lord's mind?  Now, by no means am I going to be answering these questions and that is the final answer. I do, however, want to share what the Lord [what I think the Lord] is showing me through these topics.
So, is there a correct way of prayer? I do believe that there is a certain posture that we are to come to the Lord in. We are to be humbled and we are to have faith in our prayers. But the posture of prayer that is kneeling, hands folded, peaceful, still, silent, basically all that the western christians do, is this the only way to pray? So when we see those who are shouting, swaying back and forth, bowing, etc.., do we believe that their prayers are not sincere simply because their form of praying is not what we are used to? Well, before the Lord revealed these new ways of praying to me, I had the mindset that if you are loud, swaying, meditating, reciting a ritual prayer....that those forms of praying were not the right way. I can now see that I have sheltered myself from some of the most sincere people when it comes to praying. Why don't we completely express what we are feeling inside when praying? If the Lord has turned your mourning into dancing, if you want to make a joyful noise to the Lord over all the earth, then why not express it? My joyful noise could be a blessing to someone else and therefore spur them to give thanks to the Lord. Now, I do see there needs to be a form of respect to those around us when they are in prayer. So, if I am simply expressing myself in order to draw people to me and allow them to see my holiness(haha), then by no means do I need to express myself because my praise is not sincere in the least bit. Basically, I just want us to give more thought to what the Spirit is doing inside of us. If there is a stirring in our hearts and that needs to be expressed through word or action, why not express that passion? After asking myself this question, I have seen that God has designed me to be a passion woman, and I want to use that passion to proclaim his word and the Gospel that saves our souls. [Now for the sake of length, I'm not going to talk about the other questions because I could go on and on about them and what I'm learning and other questions I have. I am sure that I will be writing a post about them soon, or you can contact me and we can talk about them!]

Solitude. Now, I think it is so ironic that I have learned so much about solitude while living in a community of 23 people! I do hope that you find that as funny as I do! Now, I will be the first one out of any of you to admit my hatred for solitude. If you could hear how much my entire mind and body are just fighting back each time I enter into solitude, you would be overwhelmed (I certainly am). So, the first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem. Hi, my name is Cameron, and I love being around people 24/7. [Hi, Cameron, you need to go spend 5 hours in solitude] That is what I hear the Lord telling me every time I admit I hate solitude. And do you want to know the lies that flood into my mind? Well. Cameron, you don't have enough time to go into solitude. Cameron, you are going to miss ALL of the fun while you are in solitude. Cameron, there is no way that you can survive 5 hours by yourself. Oh my goodness, to look at those lies makes me laugh and also humbles me. All of those lies are rooted in selfishness. If you haven't read Life Together by Dietrich Bonhoeffer, do it!( He is an advocate for solitude way more than I am, and explains it way more clear and concise than I ever could.) In Life Together, he states, "Only in the fellowship do we learn to be rightly alone and only in aloneness do we learn to live rightly in the fellowship. It is not as though the one preceded the other; both begin at the same time, namely, with the call of Jesus Christ." I can't tell you how many times during the day that I need to be reminded of that! 
"And he came out and went, as was his custom, to the Mount of Olives, and the disciples followed him. And when he came to the place, he said to them, "Pray that you may not enter into temptation." And he withdrew from them about a stone's throw, and knelt down and prayed, saying, "Father, if you are willing, remove this cup from me. Nevertheless, not my will, but yours, be done." And there appeared to him an angel from heaven, strengthening him. And being in an agony he prayed he prayed more earnestly; and his sweat became like great drops of blood falling down to the ground. And when he rose from prayer, he came to the disciples and found them sleeping for sorrow, and he said to them, "Why are you sleeping? Rise and pray that you may not enter into temptation." Luke 22:39-46
Jesus had to take time to get away and have time by himself to pray and to meditate. What makes me think that I am better than him that I don't need solitude? Oh man. By no means have I perfected the art of solitude, because only perfect practice makes perfect. So, if you are an introvert and you have a fear or discomfort with crowds of people, know that there are people out there like me (an extrovert) that has the complete opposite fear of being by myself. Woof.

Laugh. You might be so confused right now as to why I have laugh up here, and if you do then that is an indicator that you need to get to know me better. There are two things I want to share with you about laughter that I have learned. 1) there is no way that laughter can happen in my life unless I have spent time with the Lord in prayer, in his word, and in solitude. 2) laughter is a love language, and it is definitely mine. So, number one. There is no possible way that laughter, joy, can happen in my life unless I have spent time with the Lord in prayer, in his word, and in solitude. And I believe that to be true in everyone's life. One of my greatest joys in life is to share joy and laughter with others. But, a problem that I have is that joy does not get replenished daily through time with the Lord. I attempt to fill that cup of joy with my own joy, and that tends to fail EPICLY and very quickly. There is no fulfillment out of me expressing my own joy. My own joy does not bring joy to others. My own joy glorifies myself not the Lord. Therefore, I know that it is a vital part of my ministry to have time alone with the Lord so that I may glorify him through praise, joy, and laughter.

Also, I do believe that laughter is a love language. It can be classified as quality time, but I like to call it laughter. Laughter delights my heart and always me to worship in a way that I just can't explain. Love is expressed through laughter. When you laugh, you see smiles and even the worst day can be turned around with a laugh. Now, by no means do I want to sound like Happy Go Lucky Betty over here. Joy and laughter in its purest state is the most sincere way to share the joy of the Lord. And through expressing that joy, that passion, that laughter, and that love for the life He has given me, God is glorified.

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